My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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