Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
