I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
