and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
