My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Randomize
