We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize
