week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
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