these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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