I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
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