Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Randomize
