Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
