In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
