I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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