He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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