so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Randomize
