Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
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Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
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We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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