If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Randomize
