Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
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