This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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