Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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