Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
