i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
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