You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
