I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
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