Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?

  (914): View more from New York

  please be gone before i get back

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  (201): i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf? (914): please be gone before i get back http://tfl.nu/y347
  Replies (2) Good night (859) Bad night (1425)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out

  (607): View more from New York

  what a beautiful fairy tale

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  (315): he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out (607): what a beautiful fairy tale http://tfl.nu/50v3
  Replies (33) Good night (10859) Bad night (856)
• Favorite

  (417): View more from Missouri

  Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?

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  (417): Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional? http://tfl.nu/5yvr
  Replies (7) Good night (1782) Bad night (696)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?

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  (203): omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it? http://tfl.nu/nfju
  Replies (18) Good night (678) Bad night (4004)
• Favorite

  (209): View more from California

  I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.

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  (209): I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him. http://tfl.nu/e78z
  Replies (25) Good night (7721) Bad night (1025)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.

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  (919): I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could. http://tfl.nu/sgrh
  Replies (7) Good night (4111) Bad night (978)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.

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  (248): I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory. http://tfl.nu/kmrf
  Replies (4) Good night (4146) Bad night (1169)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.

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  (978): As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine. http://tfl.nu/djyf
  Replies (24) Good night (2979) Bad night (1579)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am

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  (408): who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am http://tfl.nu/787a
  Replies (13) Good night (2582) Bad night (907)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.

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  (954): my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer. http://tfl.nu/ka6k
  Replies (1) Good night (741) Bad night (1055)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.

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  (724): I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now. http://tfl.nu/lvrq
  Replies (5) Good night (2135) Bad night (526)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.

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  (978): Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home. http://tfl.nu/9m9p
  Replies (8) Good night (1239) Bad night (342)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.

  (404): View more from Georgia

  I'm a corrupt cop.

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  (678): You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably. (404): I'm a corrupt cop. http://tfl.nu/teya
  Replies (4) Good night (1833) Bad night (442)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.

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  (214): I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help. http://tfl.nu/nnry
  Replies (11) Good night (1123) Bad night (375)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!

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  (720): WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!! http://tfl.nu/4pv4
  Replies (5) Good night (291) Bad night (542)

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