Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (909): View more from California

  You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (909): You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish" http://tfl.nu/4kon
  Replies (9) Good night (3707) Bad night (802)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen http://tfl.nu/dsay
  Replies (27) Good night (2525) Bad night (2461)
• Favorite

  (231): View more from Michigan

  My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (231): My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride. http://tfl.nu/hbyc
  Replies (22) Good night (914) Bad night (4477)
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (312): It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free http://tfl.nu/rz6v
  Replies (5) Good night (911) Bad night (3649)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line. http://tfl.nu/n1fc
  Replies (10) Good night (4606) Bad night (1524)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (757): you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK. http://tfl.nu/qo45
  Replies (24) Good night (1489) Bad night (3278)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them. http://tfl.nu/7w09
  Replies (9) Good night (5326) Bad night (981)
• Favorite

  (573): View more from Missouri

  On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (573): On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower. http://tfl.nu/pdns
  Replies (3) Good night (2157) Bad night (898)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever. http://tfl.nu/2k0u
  Replies (7) Good night (2655) Bad night (727)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Ontario

  today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (905): today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag http://tfl.nu/a7zv
  Replies (5) Good night (1697) Bad night (823)
• Favorite

  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (321): You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again. http://tfl.nu/b1s4
  Replies (2) Good night (665) Bad night (1248)
• Favorite

  (931): View more from Tennessee

  You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (931): You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet http://tfl.nu/z0gl
  Replies (0) Good night (806) Bad night (368)
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  Also, beer. Big fan.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (256): Also, beer. Big fan. http://tfl.nu/g295
  Replies (1) Good night (829) Bad night (327)
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (240): Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back http://tfl.nu/vrz8
  Replies (7) Good night (910) Bad night (449)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste http://tfl.nu/vto5
  Replies (2) Good night (862) Bad night (338)

Randomize