I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
