Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
