its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
