either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize
