I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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