she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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