Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Lo siento on account of my penis...
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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