He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
