"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Drake has all the answers
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
