her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
