Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
My dick has a subreddit
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize