Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
19 Of The Most Epic “I Quit’ Stories Ever
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids