Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks