two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.