i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
