no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
