Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize