I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
vagina is talking i cant
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
The Olympian is in my bed
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
