gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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