Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
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