Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
My butt remains clenched, sir.
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