so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
