I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
