my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
