I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
You made out with two different species that night
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
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