Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize
