Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize